At the end of the film, there is a key scene in which Elio’s father, played by Michael Stuhlbarg, delivers a deeply moving monologue. The speech is dramatic, emotional, and widely considered one of the finest moments of the film.
“ When you least expect it, nature has cunning ways of finding our weakest spot” Samuel tells his heartbroken son, Elio. “But remember, I’m here. Right now, you may not want to feel anything. Maybe you never wanted to feel anything. And maybe it’s not to me that you’llwant to speak about these things.. But feel something you obviously did.”
Look,” he continues, “you had a beautiful friendship—maybe more than a friendship. And I envy you… Let me say one more thing. I’ll clear the air. I may have come close, but I never had what you two had.
Something always ….held me back, or stood in the way.”
When Elio asks his father if his mother knows, Samuel responds: “I don’t think she does.”
For many viewers, the message seemed clear: Perlman envied Elio for his relationship and his love for Oliver—something he himself had never experienced.
Many interpreted this as a suggestion that Elio’s father felt an attraction to men. But does he actually refer to a relationship with another man?
In an interview with GQ, André Aciman was asked about Samuel’s now-legendary monologue, which—thanks to Michael Stuhlbarg’s inspired performance in Luca Guadagnino’s Oscar-nominated adaptation—has become iconic among film fans.
Aciman stated that this interpretation was not his intention, or at least not how he conceived it in the novel (the monologue in the film is taken almost word for word from the book).
“This was not at all my intention when I wrote the book,” Aciman said.
The movie has basically validated that particular approach. And I have to say that I can see that this is equally a valid approach to the father’s speech. The father may have been attracted to men or not, we don’t know from the book.
From the movie, you have every right to infer that. But not in the book. So when he splits with his wife [in the sequel], he’s not splitting because he has homosexual tendencies, but simply because something must have gone wrong in their marriage.”
Sources:
https://www.indiewire.com/2019/10/call-me-by-your-name-elio-dad-gay-andre-aciman-1202186306
https://www.out.com/film/2019/10/29/call-me-your-names-author-says-elios-dad-not-gay